Lunchtime Lairs 5: Eat cheese, live longer


This week we were joined by Sam who played Hector the Hoplite and James rejoined us with a new character, Seneca of the Streets, after Fean the Quick perished a couple of weeks back. We were also missing the strong arm and directness of Blegrim.

Now according to Google a Hero is:

a person who is admired for their courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities.

It wouldn’t really be fair to describe our characters as heroes this week because they happily accepted Mina’s offer of a fat wedge of cash to bring her the head of her scheming aunt Olga. No questions – is this right, is this necessary? Just a simple ‘Yes, we’ll murder your aunt for cash, no questions asked?’ So, nothing heroic is going on this week.

After a further recon of the Olga’s home, not quite big enough to call a mansion, but surrounded by trees and railings the players took quite a bit of time determining their plan of action. Options included:

  • f84ba96f639243630112d2b69cea127dLocating a mercenary company and hiring their Trebuchet
  • Approaching a pirate ship with a view to loaning an Arbalest
  • Recruiting street urchins to create a distraction (very community focused, helping poor kids earn a crust)

In the end the plan decided upon was quite simple. Hector and Senaca would approach the house (as they would be unknown to Olga) under the pretence of having information. This would create a distraction while Romula, Andromeda and Faqual stealthily positioned themselves to attack the poor old lady.


Hector and Seneca were able to blag their way into Olga’s home convincing her and her manservant that they had information of worth with the condition that they leave all their weapons outside (Hector was able to conceal a dagger though which in the Black Hack is as good as any other weapon in the hands of a warrior). While they were doing this Romula and Andromeda were trying to sneak over the railings and Faqual approached the building from the front.

4a8a24fe9de970557356bd1a4f42aa11Of course it didn’t take long for all hell to break lose and within moments Olga was casting Charm Person spells, her manservant was hacking at Senaca, Hector (now charmed) was hacking at Senaca and Olga was making her escape. Faqual joined the fight from outside a broken window and ended up in a scrap with the manservant while Hector and Senaca duked it out. Romula and Andromeda arrived in the nick of time, Romula using the classic Cheese Wheel distraction technique to break both Hector and Senaca out of their charmed state. Andromeda quickly dispatched the manservant.

And that was were we left them. Olga had fled into another room and they were only marginally closer to having her head on a platter. I don’t think Frodo, Aragorn or Boromir have anything to worry about in Hero hit parade, but Elric may want to look over his shoulder.

It’s great to see new players coming along to Lunchtime Lairs, that’s 7 of us now and I’ve been told there are a couple more on the way. We’ll have to start a second table soon.

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